The Tyranny of E-Cig Regulation

The nut-right jihad in Milwaukee has united behind an unlikely commercial product in its effort to beat up on the Nanny State of their manipulative imaginations and pretended nightmares. The "issue" is the proposed regulation of e-cigarettes, the prospect of which has sent the hysterical wing-nut entertainers on a campaign of typically-patronizing squawking about the supposed danger to "freedom" and "liberty" from heartless bureaucrats who would dare to try to protect the populace from an untested nico-machine. Patriots unite! You have nothing to lose but your untested addictive drug delivery system!

It says here that e-cigarettes are an electronic device that contains nicotine in a liquid that vaporizes and gets sucked into the lungs, delivering soothing heart-rate-and-blood-pressure-increasing, blood-to-heart-muscle-restricting, brain-addicting nicotine into the bloodstream. It is being sold world-wide as shit without the mess to those who are trying to kick the habit of smoking real cigarettes. Even non-smokers are potential customers -- didn’t you always wonder what the big rush was that make those stupid smokers suck those poison sticks until they were smelly, sick or dead? I’m a non-smoker with a fine appreciation for the easy release of dopamine and this might be just the short-cut to serenity I need.

The FDA has refused to approve some versions of e-cigs and other countries like Australia and Canada have either banned them or advised against them. "Nicotine is a highly addictive and toxic substance, and the inhalation of propylene glycol is a known irritant," say the grown-ups at Health Canada. "Although these electronic smoking products may be marketed as a safer alternative to conventional tobacco products and, in some cases, as an aid to quitting smoking, electronic smoking products may pose risks such as nicotine poisoning and addiction."

Such sentiments and government directives are so much namby-pamby malarkey according to the pudding-heads in Milwaukee’s well-published and broadcast lunatic fringe. The Journal Sentinel’s omnipresent wing-nut, Patrick McIlheran, complained in his permanent Sunday screed-space that the effort to ban e-cigs in Washington "dwelt" on such quaint notions as "the possibility that children could order the devices and that the e-cigs haven't been proved healthy." "Haven’t been proved healthy"? Oh, pooh – silly government, trying to protect the public health again. Didn’t that function die permanently with the Bushies, when poison industry lobbyists were drafting all the "rules"? He accuses the government of "reflexively" trying to ban things so that people can’t hurt themselves in new and creative ways. This, as his knee jerks "reflexively" into a new claim of feigned victimhood for his whiny constituency.

Even the third-string squealers are getting into the act. Wretched Madison import Vicki McKenna practically hosted an infomercial for one of the on-line purveyors of e-cigs a week or so ago; having the guy on, promoting the web site and even offering discounts. This is apparently personal for McKenna, who sounds like the kind of person who sits and spouts her opinions from the end of the bar, a drink in one hand and her cigarette – e- or otherwise – hanging from her lips, while the other patrons slowly slink away. McKenna claims she has been able to cut her rate of self-destruction through burning cancer sticks by indulging in what’s-his-name’s delicious vapor product and, damn it, she should be allowed to continue to so delude herself.

Although she loudly indulges in the dreary right-wing talking points about the "tyranny" and loss of "liberty" involved in any governmental action – predictably, McKenna spent a month or so promoting the phony Madison Tea Bag psuedo-event on her show – one of her arguments appears to be that, even though e-cigs might be unhealthy, they are not as unhealthy as real cigarettes. Wow, "not as deadly as cigarettes". There’s a low standard for you. How about a bomb "not as destructive as an atomic bomb" or a nuclear accident "not as bad as Chernobyl"?

But the specifics of the manufactured e-cigarette "debate" isn’t what the wing-nuts are after. They want another fake reason for their angry-white-male demographic to feel oppressed by the Big Brother government that only exists in their heads. In right-wing fantasy-land, "they" are coming for your guns, coming for your e-cigs, blah de blah blah. It’s a tiresome routine, but you have to forgive them. Tied to the rock of the Party of No, they sink slowly in the ocean of their own failure. Self-victimization is all they have. Poor babies.