Sunday, March 28, 2010

Don’t You Know That You Can Count Me Out (In)

The primary purveyor of violent revolution on local mainstream radio is the putrid Vicki McKenna on WISN. McKenna – who phones in her shtick from Madison, where she has been a thorn in the side of Truth and Common Sense for years – fancies herself a leader of the Tea Baggers. She even manages to get herself on the podium at their dog-and-pony shows, opening for such brilliant orators as Not-Joe the Not-Plumber and Michelle Malkin.

As the loopy right lost its collective mind over the passage of moderate health insurance regulation last week, McKenna was right out there with them, baying at the moon and pretending the People would soon extract Vengeance for this Tyrannical attack on Liberty. Or some such nonsense. McKenna offers up her two hours of free radio time every weekday morning to provide remarkably free advertising for all things Tea and GOP (same thing). Any staged astro-turf “rally” is promoted for weeks on her show. Republican politicians have a free pass to visit McKenna by phone or in studio any time to blather about their latest campaigns or ludicrous legislation. It has gotten to the point that she and Scott Walker should just, well, get a room.

And McKenna had a special message last week for anyone stupid enough to take her seriously, post-health insurance reform. In her standard “come on, people” mode, McKenna said, yeah, we gotta win Congress back in 2010; gotta take back the White House in 2012, gotta repeal and (hah) repair the health insurance legislation. But if she and her band of (now and future) losers can’t win at the ballot box...I mean, obviously, democracy be damned. Early last week, McKenna was forced to try to talk one of her dimmer listeners out of taking a gun to Washington -- for now, anyway. But McKenna’s only problem with that was timing. If we don’t win Congress back; if we don’t take the presidency back; if those elected to office don’t do what we say, well, then....

Then – what, exactly? The right-wing talking-point of alluding and winking at violent revolution throughout its echo-chamber got me to thinking – exactly what would that look like? When a supposed military guy like Owen Robinson says that violent revolution in the United States is inevitable, he must have some idea how that might happen as a practical matter (and some idea which side he would be on). I’m no military strategist, but it seems to me the following options are available when the unspontaneous combustion of the astro-prairie fire takes place:

  • Luxury Tanks and Jet Stream Air Force – I imagine there are still training camps in northern Wisconsin used by the long, lost Posse Comitatus willing to provide space to train the silver-spooned would-be revolutionaries. (The racist Posse guys  and the other loopy McVeigh-wannabees are all at the Tea Party, anyway). After a couple weeks of hi-balls and paying the poor slobs who buy their crap to do their push-ups for them, the whole group will load into luxury coaches and private jets to head off to take their rightful place at the seat of power. The first problem will come at the Illinois border, where unanticipated toll booths will slow down the Charge of the Light-Headed Brigade significantly.
  • Join Us! – In their fevered imagination, the Tea Baggers think all they have to do is grab their torches and pitchforks at the anointed time, head out the door and have the oppressed populace follow them out into the streets to storm the barricades of Washington. I’d like to see them try it. Out in the street, the Paul Revere in their heads pounding like a bad migraine, they will look back and see – nobody. Nobody is going to follow these arrogant clowns into the street, least of all to take away the new stability of their health care coverage. They will see only each other, at the designated place, seeing only the same red-necks who were at the meeting where they planned this fiasco in the first place. Welcome to the revolution. Now, who wants to go for beers
  • Military Coup – The wet-dream of every political military man like Owen Robinson is to have the military commit treasonous mutiny and overthrow the inconvenient civilian government. Otherwise, how do they expect to overcome the finest military in the world that, if not co-opted would surely defend the government from the violent revolution they imagine? Such an expectation is an insult to the men and women who pledge the support the nation and – most importantly – its Constitution. The fine men and women who serve are not going to risk their reputation, honor and liberty for a bunch of greedheads who only want a change in health care policy to benefit their corporate benefactors.
  • Terrorism – In the end, since the other types of violent revolution above are doomed to fail, this is really what the Tea Baggers are hoping for – a violent campaign of terror that will cause the sensible among us to crumble under their favorite tactic: FEAR. You could see it already last week in the campaign to break windows of non-pliant Congressmen, in the hateful voicemails, the white powder mailed in envelopes. Pretty funny coming from those who have been the first to wave the red flag of foreign terrorist Fear every time they wanted to curtail a civil liberty or elect a doofus like Junior Bush. But, in the end, it’s the only violent revolution they will have. Terrorism, after all, is the last refuge of the powerless, and the unelectable Tea Baggers are and will remain as powerless as they come.
So, bring it on, would-be violent revolutionaries. As President Obama said about Republicans repealing his moderate health insurance reform, “let them try”. Let’s get this phony specter of violent revolution out of the way by them trying and failing miserably. We shouldn’t even bother locking them up. Just pat them on the head and send them home. Come on back when you get a clue, losers.


Anonymous said...

Mikey, only fucking loser is YOU, let off a murderer lately? If so, that makes you a murderer as well, we will take back congress this year, bet on it, LOSER

Mike Plaisted said...

Once again, Cowardly Anony Mikey Caller (CAMC) brings honor and dignity to the proceedings. And you wonder why I haven't been posting much lately. Why, when jerks like CAMC keep making my point for me?

Anonymous said...

Like you have brought Honor and dignity to anything you have ever wrote, you are such a hypocrite. You name call, smear, lie, worse than any conservative ever has. You bend the facts to fit your "argument" then you try to demean anyone who dare challenge your opinion. You are wrong, and you are the cowardly cut and run liberal piece of shit, like Obama you own the shit this country is in since its disasterous turn towards socialism, this country is bankrupt and unemployment will hit 30% after the "evil" corporations move jobs off shore to prevent the obamination taxes. Small businesses will take steps to get under 50 to avoid the taxes, growing companies will stop at 49 to also avoid the taxes. Simple business economics, these are the facts, very much undisputable, massive job loss is about to begin. Publish this you scumbag loser, you don't have the balls because I am right.

Mike Plaisted said...

Pretty bold predictions there, Coward Anony 2. Since you are such a chickenshit, hide-in-the-weeds loser, we won't know where to go to laugh at you when your dire predictions fail to materialize. How convenient for you to be able to throw shit against the wall and not even care if it sticks. It's creating the stink that counts, right, CA2? Pathetic.

P.S.: You people have to stop daring me to do things. It just makes it too easy to prove you wrong.

Anonymous said...

The predictions are not bold at all, as numerous corporations and smaller businesses have already announced their intentions to move and illiminate jobs in US. But obviously, you have no knowlege of basic ecomomics, but alas, I am the one with a degree in Economics and a MBA in Business, I hope I am wrong, but not likely. Scumbag defense attorney, Mikey, when you get paid with drug money, blood money for defending murderers, pimps and drug dealers, how do you live with yourself? Go crawl back under the rock you came from

Mike Plaisted said...

Alright, CA2, that's enough! No soup for you!

And, the same way we can't get back to you when your predictions fail because you're such a cowardly putz, we also can't check whether you really have those stellar credentials, now can we. How convenient for you. Of course, since Junior Bush had the same, it's not really all that impressive, now is it?

It really has been fun, CA2, but I will not be publishing any more of your bullshit. It's not fair to the rest of the right-wing lunatics for you to make them look so bad.

Tom McMahon said...

Mike, you're the absinthe of Milwaukee's Lefty Blogs. :-)

Display Name said...

TEA Party Revolution? Really. You’re going to take up arms against… Who? Da Gummint? So you start small. Do it on a Monday in spring. Can’t do it on a Packer football Sunday in the fall, no one will come. Convince every able-bodied man who last Friday lacked the courage to ask for a raise or even tell his wife that the black dress does indeed make her butt too big, and by Monday he’ll be ready to start this civil war with you. Go to City Hall, shoot everyone there if they won’t reduce your taxes by firing themselves. Take out the local cops just because they were around to try to defend the lives of people at City Hall. Head for the County building. Who would you like to shoot there? Administrators? Department heads? Judges? Clerks? Head for the local school. Wave your deer rifle at the teachers. Did you tell all the kids to stay home from school? Tell them to close your eyes while you reduce spending. Perforate your friends and neighbors on the school board. Head to Madison. Storm the dome. What does your gun do there? It stops the spending exactly how?

Go ahead, tell me what you’re going to insurrect against. You might not shoot the guy who runs your wastewater treatment plant, or the water system, or the electrical utility, but are you shooting the guy who pays him? The elected official who told someone to pay him? Then what? Head home, crack a brew, turn on the TV, wait for the toilet to overflow, the lights to go out, the freezer to stop? Heaven forbid your new civil war disturbs the flow of life. Gosh, I hope the bad people don’t take over in the crisis.